Over the past several weeks, I have found myself paying closer attention to something that does not always make it onto my to-do list but quietly influences everything on it: my energy. Not just whether I am busy. Not whether I am productive. Not even whether I am making progress on my goals. But whether I am operating from a place of steadiness and alignment, or from a place of quiet depletion.
This season has been full in many good ways. I am continuing to grow Mission ENSPIRE, preparing for speaking engagements and managing the responsibilities of my leadership role in my day job. None of these things are new to me, and none of them are unwelcome. In fact, they are deeply aligned with my purpose. But alignment does not automatically guarantee sustainability, and that is where I have had to pause.
As leaders, especially as women who lead in multiple spaces, we often become very skilled at carrying a lot. We know how to show up. We know how to deliver. We know how to hold space for others while quietly managing our own expectations and responsibilities in the background. Over time, that capacity becomes something people rely on. Sometimes we rely on it too.
But just because we are capable does not mean we are always operating within healthy capacity.
I have learned that when my energy begins to shift, it rarely announces itself in dramatic ways. It does not usually look like burnout in the way we imagine it. More often, it shows up as subtle irritability, or a slower pace in my creativity, or a feeling that even meaningful work requires more effort than usual. It is less about collapse and more about erosion. And that is usually my signal to pay attention.
Recently, I did what I would describe as a quiet energy audit. I did not overhaul my calendar or make sweeping declarations. Instead, I asked myself a few honest questions. Where am I feeling energized right now? Where am I feeling stretched? Are there commitments I have taken on out of habit rather than intention? Are there places where I am defaulting to availability instead of alignment?
What I noticed was not catastrophic, but it was instructive. There were small “yeses” that did not fully reflect this season. There were moments where I had extended myself simply because I could. There were areas where I had not clearly defined what was mine to carry and what was not. None of those things were inherently wrong. But collectively, they were costly.
Energy, I am realizing more deeply, is not just about sleep or rest days, although those matter. It is about stewardship. It is about recognizing that my leadership, my creativity, my clarity and even my presence with my family are all connected to how well I manage what I allow to draw from me.
This month, I have been reflecting on this topic even more intentionally because I am one of the speakers inside MEE Month, and Week 2 of the experience focused on Energy. My session is titled Stop Pouring From an Empty Cup: Energy Boundaries for Women Who Lead, and in it I explore many of these same questions from a coaching perspective.
Even though Energy Week has passed, the sessions are available throughout the month, and I wanted to share this with you because I know how easy it is to normalize depletion when you are competent and committed. In my session, I talk about recognizing where energy is quietly leaking, setting boundaries that are sustainable rather than reactive, and reframing self-care not as indulgence but as leadership strategy.
If you have been feeling slightly off, slightly stretched, or simply more tired than your schedule seems to justify, this conversation may resonate with you.
As I continue reflecting on energy and alignment, I am also beginning to notice how closely connected this topic is to perfectionism. Sometimes we overextend not because we lack boundaries, but because we are trying to meet an internal standard that keeps moving. We tell ourselves we just need to do a little more, refine a little more, prove a little more.
This is not the first time I have wrestled with this tension. In From Perfectionist to Progress-Seeker: Embracing the Imperfect Journey, I began exploring what it means to loosen the grip of perfectionism. Next month, I want to explore that more fully and talk about what it really means to move from perfectionism to progress, and how releasing unrealistic standards can restore not only our confidence, but our capacity. Because protecting your energy is one step. Learning to stop holding yourself to impossible expectations may be the next.